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Don't wanna sound gay or nuthin'.

I found myself at a traffic light the other day, watching the other drivers and waiting for my light to change. As I did, a man in no shirt drove by in a sedan. It was the most awkward thing I've seen while driving, I think. I never knew how strange it looked when people drove around shirtless. It looks like they might be naked. It's just awkward. And I'm a guy who drives shirtless on occasion.

I've found that my worst ideas tend to be the ones I think about. Because I have time to consider all the aspects of them before convincing myself that they are good. My impulse decisions, which are also bad, are somehow less bad than those that I stew on for a while.

A friend of mine told me that I seemed like a person who could pull off having shaved legs. I don't think of myself as a particularly hairy person, but I tend to worry about being considered a hairy person. And so his statement stuck in my mind for a long couple of weeks. Ultimately, it came down to this thought: girls have nice, smooth legs when they shave. I could have nice, smooth legs.

But I never felt brave enough to actually set out with the sole intention of shaving my legs. Then, one day, I found myself shaving in the shower. Sometimes, in the interest of saving time during my day, I like to combine activities which actually end up wasting more time. Since I don't have a mirror in my shower, I have to finish shaving when I get out, but then again when am I ever at a loss for time in my days. As I shaved I realized that the stage had been set, albeit accidentally.

And so I took a few swipes at my legs. Where no one would see it, of course. It was an experiment. I took some light drags along my thighs, hoping to be casual about it. I wasn't going for skin, just less hair. Just to see what it was like. When I was satisfied that the whole thing looked pretty normal and not like I had tried to shave my legs in the shower, I washed up and dried up.
And it was then that I found that there is no such thing as casual shaving. There were some random, bare patches of skin on my legs where I had casually shaved off all the hair. And the hair on your legs apparently doesn't grow back as fast as hair you have in other places. Now, almost a week later, the bare patches are getting prickly and fuzzy again and it is an awful experience.

I'd like to say I learned a lesson from this, but, well, you know.

Comments

Ashley said…
Ha. I dont' even know what to say to that.
July 16, 2009 at 12:10 PM
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