As I sat there staring deeply into the pathetic attempt at pizza eating on my plate I realized something. Something important, I think. I am not very good at conversations. My mind started to drift to increasingly non-pertinent topics such as the time my friend and I found a deserted town and the time we went through the cave at Enchanted Rock. I struggled to snap myself back into the conversation at hand. "I really like fruit." She said. "What is your favorite kind of fruit?" I asked.
Facepalm.
Shouldn't I be getting past questions like that? I feel like I should actually be talking, not asking MySpace profile questions. I was hungry but my stomach was so twisted up I stopped being hungry. That was not really that great. I ended up not eating that much. That's okay. Plenty of opportunities to eat food. Not enough opportunities to talk.
That is okay too.
I guess talking to people just takes practice. Or maybe it's something that comes naturally to you. I am not that sure how sociability works. It's strange. I don't want to clam up. That would be terrible if I did. It's like a leashed dog. The dog gets used to tugging at the leash for so long that when you finally let it off it runs away. It always comes back, though, and stays in the same place where it had been leashed up. It got comfortable in that little area. It was a little part of the world where it could stay forever and never have a problem. I guess that is how I feel. I feel leashed up. Except I am not a dog. I don't feel like that.
That's okay. There's always next time. Sometimes.
Facepalm.
Shouldn't I be getting past questions like that? I feel like I should actually be talking, not asking MySpace profile questions. I was hungry but my stomach was so twisted up I stopped being hungry. That was not really that great. I ended up not eating that much. That's okay. Plenty of opportunities to eat food. Not enough opportunities to talk.
That is okay too.
I guess talking to people just takes practice. Or maybe it's something that comes naturally to you. I am not that sure how sociability works. It's strange. I don't want to clam up. That would be terrible if I did. It's like a leashed dog. The dog gets used to tugging at the leash for so long that when you finally let it off it runs away. It always comes back, though, and stays in the same place where it had been leashed up. It got comfortable in that little area. It was a little part of the world where it could stay forever and never have a problem. I guess that is how I feel. I feel leashed up. Except I am not a dog. I don't feel like that.
That's okay. There's always next time. Sometimes.
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