Bus driver? I'll let you finish.

After I left work I got stuck in traffic. It's been such a long time since I've really driven anywhere. I forgot about the traffic. I pulled to a stop at a red light. On the side of the road in some gravel was a school bus. Must be on its way to school, I thought. I saw the bus driver standing next to it.

He was peeing on the bus.

There was no mistake in my mind that he was peeing on the bus. Not in the bushes or just off to the side of it. On the bus. He was peeing on the bus. I don't understand that. Why would you pee on what's yours? I would probably never pee on my own car. I've peed on cars belonging to other people, but that's different. Your car is a part of you in the same way a bicycle is part of you. An extension. A dancing partner. You don't pee on your dancing partner.

So I kept driving. Seriously, though. Who does that?

Sometimes I think about leaving. Acting on some dreams. Going places. Doing things. What's holding me down, anyway? Reality? Since when do I pay attention to that. It is a good thing, I think, to have a solid grasp on reality. I'm working on it. I wish I could work faster. That's okay.

Comments

Ashley said…

Going after dreams is important, but staying grounded is important, too. Dreams don't just happen most of the time. Usually people have to put in a lot of work to reach their goals.

IF you really want something, go get it. You can't sit around thinking of how much you want it without taking action.

Easier said than done? Definitely, but nobody said it would be easy.

October 18, 2008 at 4:51 PM

Anonymity said…

If you really wanted to go, wouldn't you? I've been thinking the same thing. But I guess I don't really want to because I haven't said it out loud.

October 18, 2008 at 5:15 PM

Pseudo-science (like psych).

I consider myself a man of science. I try to approach problems and deal with them logically, using observations previously recorded to handle new problems. So of course my interest was piqued when someone I knew posited that men are needier and more complicated than women. An interesting theory. But to properly examine it, one must understand the concept of sexual selection and its two aspects: male competition and female choice. Which brings us to point one: men are needier [in relationships] than women. This is true. In a natural/primal setting, the males are generally love-'em-leave-'em kinds of guys. Their main objective is to reproduce as much as they can. Humans, in their infinite wisdom, have decreased the emphasis on this to the point where it has become a footnote in male purpose. Civilization dictates that, instead of finding a partner for the sole purpose of reproduction, males find females for life companionship. With the effective removal of their natur...

Just the stirring in my soul.

I, really, kind of don't want to be here anymore. Not in the sense that I am dissatisfied with my life or my present situation--which isn't to say that I'm not , because I am in a way--but in the sense that I am dissatisfied with the lack of things happening. I keep looking around. Out the window of my room. Out the window of my car. Out the window of the living room. I want to be on the other side of that glass. That's where the action is. I need, desperately, an adventure. I need to go somewhere. See something. Anywhere, anything. I don't care where or what as long as it's happening. I want to travel so badly. Grab my backpack and my camera and walk away. I'd settle for going to the same state park I've been to a hundred times over. It's this routine I'm stuck in. Seeing the same shit every day, going through the same motions. I need to change it up, break things. I need some vitality--being cooped up is killing me. What I re...

No, Holmes, no!

All I ever think about these days is how much I have to/want to study. I hope that's not how I have a good time, now. Would I rather go hang out with peeps or would I rather sit in and study? It is a difficult question to answer. Just a couple more days and then I can focus all my energy on the next greatest idea I've ever had: iconic detectives and sharks.

everything is fine

Search This Blog