I'm walking home right now.

The other day I saw a butterfly fluttering around. Suddenly, a bird swooped down to snatch it out of the air. Before the bird could grab the butterfly in its beak, another bird swooped down and attacked the first bird. The two birds struggled in flight for a moment before going their separate ways.

And the butterfly fluttered away.

It's tempting to read into the story with some bullshit insight about how people can overcome their differences to help each other and accomplish good things which can then be applied to racism and intolerance and such. Or maybe it was a story about how lucky people can be without realizing it--or appreciating it.

But I think the best interpretation is that it's easier for people to hate each other.

I've been working on being less bitter and cynical because I haven't earned the right to be. I don't have enough jaded years under my belt to justify a world-weary attitude. And, more importantly, I don't need to be. I shouldn't be. I'm better than that. She makes me want to, you know, hug the world. Not that she does. I just feel bad being so misanthropic.

It's funny, though. People always think I'm off the edge when I get into my people-hating phases but when they share my experiences, they end up doing the exact same.

Comments

Pseudo-science (like psych).

I consider myself a man of science. I try to approach problems and deal with them logically, using observations previously recorded to handle new problems. So of course my interest was piqued when someone I knew posited that men are needier and more complicated than women. An interesting theory. But to properly examine it, one must understand the concept of sexual selection and its two aspects: male competition and female choice. Which brings us to point one: men are needier [in relationships] than women. This is true. In a natural/primal setting, the males are generally love-'em-leave-'em kinds of guys. Their main objective is to reproduce as much as they can. Humans, in their infinite wisdom, have decreased the emphasis on this to the point where it has become a footnote in male purpose. Civilization dictates that, instead of finding a partner for the sole purpose of reproduction, males find females for life companionship. With the effective removal of their natur...

Just the stirring in my soul.

I, really, kind of don't want to be here anymore. Not in the sense that I am dissatisfied with my life or my present situation--which isn't to say that I'm not , because I am in a way--but in the sense that I am dissatisfied with the lack of things happening. I keep looking around. Out the window of my room. Out the window of my car. Out the window of the living room. I want to be on the other side of that glass. That's where the action is. I need, desperately, an adventure. I need to go somewhere. See something. Anywhere, anything. I don't care where or what as long as it's happening. I want to travel so badly. Grab my backpack and my camera and walk away. I'd settle for going to the same state park I've been to a hundred times over. It's this routine I'm stuck in. Seeing the same shit every day, going through the same motions. I need to change it up, break things. I need some vitality--being cooped up is killing me. What I re...

No, Holmes, no!

All I ever think about these days is how much I have to/want to study. I hope that's not how I have a good time, now. Would I rather go hang out with peeps or would I rather sit in and study? It is a difficult question to answer. Just a couple more days and then I can focus all my energy on the next greatest idea I've ever had: iconic detectives and sharks.

everything is fine

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