Makes me kind of nervous to say so.

It was such a nice day that I couldn't help but ride my bike around. I put Beck on and cruised around campus with my sunglasses. It's starting to feel like summer. Sunny days, smiling faces, flip-flops, and pale skin. It's okay. A few hours in the sun will solve that. I want to go on an adventure somewhere. Dogs and bicycles and friends and music. Not too much longer.

John told me about joining the cycling club on campus. I was immediately excited. Ever since I found out about the Texas 4000 team riding to Alaska I've been wanting to get more into biking. Maybe even get a road bike? That's a big leap, though. A bicycle is another instrument. It's a big obligation. Got to ride it around. I don't know if I'm ready for that kind of commitment. I'll stick with my mountain bike for now. I'm going to go riding this weekend. I'm too excited. I want to have at least one solid crash. Or ride off into the creek. That's probably a bad idea, but it'd be fun.

Michael and I are going to Zilker park tomorrow for lunch. Inside, I know I really shouldn't but under that I really, really want to. I haven't gone swimming in a long time. I just want to relax a little. Then it's back to grinding. Schoolwork. I can't believe I ever wanted to grow up.

I'm afraid of rushing things. Things tend to get messed up when you rush them, and I tend to rush things. Deep breath.

Comments

Pseudo-science (like psych).

I consider myself a man of science. I try to approach problems and deal with them logically, using observations previously recorded to handle new problems. So of course my interest was piqued when someone I knew posited that men are needier and more complicated than women. An interesting theory. But to properly examine it, one must understand the concept of sexual selection and its two aspects: male competition and female choice. Which brings us to point one: men are needier [in relationships] than women. This is true. In a natural/primal setting, the males are generally love-'em-leave-'em kinds of guys. Their main objective is to reproduce as much as they can. Humans, in their infinite wisdom, have decreased the emphasis on this to the point where it has become a footnote in male purpose. Civilization dictates that, instead of finding a partner for the sole purpose of reproduction, males find females for life companionship. With the effective removal of their natur...

Just the stirring in my soul.

I, really, kind of don't want to be here anymore. Not in the sense that I am dissatisfied with my life or my present situation--which isn't to say that I'm not , because I am in a way--but in the sense that I am dissatisfied with the lack of things happening. I keep looking around. Out the window of my room. Out the window of my car. Out the window of the living room. I want to be on the other side of that glass. That's where the action is. I need, desperately, an adventure. I need to go somewhere. See something. Anywhere, anything. I don't care where or what as long as it's happening. I want to travel so badly. Grab my backpack and my camera and walk away. I'd settle for going to the same state park I've been to a hundred times over. It's this routine I'm stuck in. Seeing the same shit every day, going through the same motions. I need to change it up, break things. I need some vitality--being cooped up is killing me. What I re...

No, Holmes, no!

All I ever think about these days is how much I have to/want to study. I hope that's not how I have a good time, now. Would I rather go hang out with peeps or would I rather sit in and study? It is a difficult question to answer. Just a couple more days and then I can focus all my energy on the next greatest idea I've ever had: iconic detectives and sharks.

everything is fine

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